Forgotten Son Page 11

  Caroline still didn’t say a word, letting him talk because she had a feeling that Eli didn’t speak about himself often, if ever.

  “Althea finally left him and my mom thought he’d marry her then, but he didn’t. I was around ten and I hated him. I heard him tell Vera, my mom, many times that I wasn’t his—that she slept with other men so I had to be someone else’s. Vera never saw other men. Joe McCain was the only man in her life as far back as I can remember.”

  “Then you’ve never had a relationship with your brothers?”

  “No. As a kid I was always in trouble, fighting and skipping school. Finally I stole a car and the police caught me. Vera called her uncle, Jess Tucker, a retired Texas Ranger. He came to Waco and told the judge that if I was released into his custody, he’d make sure I stayed out of trouble. That saved me from a life of crime.”

  She couldn’t even imagine Eli being anything but law abiding and her heart ached for that little boy whose life had been so turbulent.

  “If you haven’t had any contact with the McCains, why did they want to see you?”

  “A few years ago Jake’s son was kidnapped by his biological mother, who was a drug addict, as was her boyfriend. Tuck and I just happened to be in Waco at the time and we heard the news of the kidnapping. We’d had a lot of encounters with the boyfriend, Rusty Fobbs. When I worked for the DPS, I stopped him more times than I cared to remember. Tuck had, too. We tried to help him, but Rusty was one of those kids who tried but could never stick to much of anything. He’d rather steal than work.”

  “So what happened?”

  “I tried to talk him into releasing the boy, but Rusty was never one for listening, either. The mother knew he was going to kill Ben so she pushed him out a window. Rusty then shot her and himself before we could get into the trailer.”

  “Oh. How sad.”

  “Yes. But Ben, the boy, is fine. He’s about six now.” Eli took a breath. “Ever since then Jake had tried to contact me, wanting to talk. I’m just not interested. I’m not part of their family and I never will be.”

  “But they are family.” Even as she said the words she wanted to take them back. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that,” she murmured, not wanting to ruin the pleasant conversation they were having.

  “Sometimes I tell myself that, but I can’t get past those wounds from my childhood.”

  “You want to. I can hear it in your voice.”

  “Maybe. Maybe not,” he admitted, and she could feel his eyes on her in the darkness. “My turn to ask a question. Why did you break up with your fiancé?”

  “We just couldn’t…” Lightning split the sky as a thundercloud burst, and raindrops splattered their heads. “Oh, my goodness.”

  Eli grabbed her hand and they ran for the car. He unlocked a door and retrieved her purse, then they made a dash for her apartment just as it began to rain in earnest.

  Caroline quickly inserted her key and pushed the door opened. Eli caught her arm. “Did you leave the lights on?”

  “Yes.” She always left the lights on now. She couldn’t face coming home to a dark apartment.

  They hurried inside, both of them wet and dripping. Caroline ran to the bathroom and brought back towels. Eli’s hair was plastered to his head and she realized hers was, too. Their clothes were drenched.

  “Let me have your shirt and slacks and I’ll put them in the dryer.”

  “That’s fine. I’ll just dry off and head home.”

  “It’s early,” she said. “Please don’t go.”

  Eli didn’t miss the plea in her voice and knew it had something to do with her leaving the lights on.

  “I don’t have anything to put on,” he replied, looking for a way to leave, but really not wanting to.

  “I have a man’s bathrobe you can wear until your clothes dry.”

  A man’s bathrobe.

  Her fiancé’s, probably. Eli didn’t want to wear the man’s robe, but found himself saying, “Okay.”

  “It’s my dad’s,” she said, and that made him feel better.

  “They spent a night here when their house had termites. Grace was in the process of moving so they stayed with me. They flew to Washington the next day and it was a welcome relief for all of us. Dad left the robe behind and it’s in the utility room, on the back of the door. I’ll go get out of these wet clothes. Just leave your things in there and I’ll dry them.”

  Eli walked to the room, found the robe and removed his clothes. The robe didn’t fit all that well. It was silk and had the congressman’s initials on the pocket. Eli wasn’t used to wearing robes like this, but it covered him. He placed his boots and belt on the counter and put his clothes in the dryer.

  “You didn’t have to do that,” Caroline said, standing in the doorway in a T-shirt and pajama bottoms. Wet tendrils hung around her face and he thought she looked beautiful. Fast on that thought came the realization that the situation was getting a little too intimate.

  “I’ve lived alone for a long time and I know how to use a dryer.” His words came out sharper than he’d intended, and he hated himself when he saw that flicker of hurt in her green eyes.

  “Coffee is ready.” She turned toward the kitchen. “How about a cup?”

  He followed her. She stopped at the coffeemaker and glanced at him. “Do you want to pour your cup or do you want me to?”

  Amusement dripped from every word, and despite himself, he grinned. “Point taken. I was a bit crass because…”

  “Because you’re a man,” she stated.

  “Yep. That about sums it up.”

  “Piece of advice, Eli. When a woman offers to do something for you, let her.”

  “Mmm. I like my coffee black and strong and I’d like it in the den.” On that he marched into the den, but not before he saw her smile.

  He sat on the sofa and looked around. The sofa was tan with maroon and dark green throw pillows. The drapes were floral. Photo magazines were scattered on the coffee table and the room had a homey feel. He liked it.

  Caroline came in and handed him a cup, then sat cross-legged on the end of the sofa not three feet from him.

  “Thanks,” he said.

  “Did it hurt?”

  “What?”

  “Letting a woman do something for you.”

  He took a sip. “No. It actually feels pretty good and the coffee is great.”

  “Thank you.”

  “People that know me say I don’t need anything or anyone. I’m self-sufficient. Tuck tells me that at least once a week.” Eli couldn’t imagine why he was telling her so much. Sharing things about himself wasn’t like him at all.

  “You and Tuck are very close.”

  “Yeah. He’s the only family I’ve got.”

  Caroline twisted her cup and couldn’t resist saying, “You have blood brothers.”

  “Hmm.” He stared into the dark liquid, not at all angry she’d said that. “You know how you get a scrape or a cut—like my arm? Those scars heal, but the inner scars from my childhood haven’t healed. I’m not sure they ever will.”

  “Do you resent that the McCains had a father and you didn’t?”

  He shrugged. “I never liked Joe McCain because of the way he treated my mother, and me, too. He was a very controlling man, but I’m not sure what kind of father he was. When Althea left, Beau went with her, but Jake refused. He stayed with his father.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know that part of the story. I just know he stayed with Joe, because we were in the same class at school.”

  “What about the other son?”

  “His name is Caleb, and Althea was pregnant with him at the time.”

  Caroline frowned. “That’s odd that she’d leave when she was pregnant.”

  “There was a lot of talk around them, but I ignored it.”

  “But now you want to know.”

  He shrugged and said the same thing he had on the sidewalk, “Maybe. Maybe not.”

 
She scooted closer. “I think it’s a definite maybe.”

  “And I think we’re talking too much about me.” He knew she was right, but it would be a very difficult step to take. He thought it was time to change the subject. “What happened with your fiancé?”

  She stared at a picture on the wall. “Colin and I had a lot in common. He owned camera stores and I was a photographer. There’s not anything he doesn’t know about cameras and how they work. He happened to be in the store one day when I was purchasing a new camera. I was asking the salesperson all these questions and he came over and explained in more detail. He gave me his number and said if I had problems, to just call. We talked several times on the phone about the camera, then he asked me out. We dated for six months and he asked me to marry him. I said yes because we had a good relationship and I knew we could have a good marriage.”

  She stopped speaking.

  “You don’t now?” Eli asked.

  “No. Love to me is putting the other person before yourself and being there no matter what.” She set her cup on the coffee table. “Colin kept pressuring me to set a date for the wedding. He wanted to get married as soon as possible. I was reluctant and I wasn’t sure why. I’m thirty years old and I thought I was ready for that kind of commitment. Colin had a store opening in Houston and I was going to go with him. I had decided to set the wedding date and I was going to tell him then. But I was kidnapped and…”

  She stopped again. “When you rescued me, I was so anxious to see Colin, but he wasn’t there. He went to the opening in Houston not knowing if I was dead or alive. I tried to understand his reasons—the wait was getting to him and he had to do something—but I can’t understand and I never will. I just don’t want to marry someone who doesn’t put me first in his life.”

  Eli couldn’t imagine a man doing what Colin had done, and he could see how much the man’s actions had hurt Caroline. Eli thought it best to get off the subject.

  He placed his cup beside hers. “Why do you leave your lights on?”

  She shifted uneasily. “I’m having a hard time with the darkness now. As long as its daylight and the lights are on at night, I’m fine.”

  “What do you do when you go to bed?”

  “Leave the light on.” She linked her fingers together. “That first night when I was in the hospital, I woke up to darkness and thought I was back in that room. I felt as if I was suffocating and I don’t want to feel that again, so I leave the light on.”

  “It was fresh in your mind,” he told her. “It may not be that way now.”

  She shook her head. “It’s always going to be fresh in my mind.”

  Eli watched her for a moment. “Are you afraid, Caroline?”

  She nodded.

  “Don’t let Buford do this to you. Don’t let him control your emotions.”

  She tucked a strand of wet hair behind her ear. “I’m not sure how to stop it.”

  “By turning the light out tonight when you go to bed.”

  She bit her lip. “I don’t know if I can do that.”

  Seeing her bent head twisted something deep in him.

  “I’ll help you.”

  She raised her eyes to his. “How?”

  “I’ll stay the night. Maybe if someone is here it will be easier for you.”

  Her eyes opened wide. “You’d do that?”

  “Sure. After that dog ripped open my arm, I only took enough time off to get treatment at the hospital, because I was determined to help the FBI gather all the evidence. But now we’ve reached a lull in the investigation. We’re waiting for the prosecutors and defense attorneys to do their jobs. So my captain has ordered me to take some time off, starting tomorrow. I don’t have to worry about going in to work.” He looked down at the robe. “And I’m ready for bed.”

  She smiled. “Yes, you are.”

  “Consider it a birthday present. We’ll turn off the lights. I’ll sleep here on the sofa and you go to your bed.”

  “Okay.” The dryer buzzed and she stood. “I’ll get your clothes or—” she glanced at him “—do you want to do that?”

  He grinned. “You can do it.”

  She hurried to the utility room, removed his slacks and shirt and put them on hangers, then went to the hall closet and got a blanket and a pillow. She carried them to Eli.

  He took them. “You can do this. Do not sleep one more night with the light on. You’re stronger than that. I know you are.”

  “Okay. I hope you’ll be comfortable here. I used to have a spare bedroom, but I turned it into a darkroom.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. Now go to bed.”

  “Good night, Eli.” She leaned over and kissed his cheek.

  “Night.”

  Eli held a hand to his cheek as she ran to the bedroom. Soon the light was out, and he lay on the sofa and stretched out. He didn’t have a clue as to what he was thinking anymore. He should be on his way to his place, but somehow he couldn’t leave her. She had to conquer this fear or it would control her forever. He’d seen what fear had done to Ginny and he didn’t want another woman to go through that, especially not Caroline.

  THE RAIN PEPPERED the window and Caroline tossed and turned. She had to go to sleep but recognized she was doing everything to keep from doing that. Darkness was all around her and if she closed her eyes she would be completely submerged in it. And that horrible suffocating feeling would be there. No, she couldn’t do this. She needed more time. She got up to turn the light on, but her hand paused over the light switch. Eli was framed in the doorway.

  “Don’t do it,” he said in a low voice.

  “I—I…”

  “Come,” he said, and took her hand and guided her back to bed. “I’ll sit here until you fall asleep.”

  She crawled into bed and reached for his hand. If she could touch Eli, feel his strength, then she might be able to conquer this fear. “I’m afraid to close my eyes.”

  “I know. Think about something else.”

  “When Grace and I were small, she used to be scared of the dark, especially when our parents were away. She’d come to my room and sleep with me. I’d tell her that the darkness was nothing to be afraid of and that I was much meaner than the darkness and I would protect her. It’s so strange that now I’m the one frightened of the dark.”

  “It’s still nothing to be afraid of. I’m here and I am much meaner than the dark.”

  “You’re nice. Sweet and compassionate, too.”

  “Don’t tell anyone who knows me that.”

  There was silence for a moment, then Caroline said, “Eli?”

  “Hmm?”

  “You will be here when I wake up?”

  “Yes, Caroline. I will be here. Happy birthday.” He put his other hand over her eyes. “Close them.”

  She felt his fingers against her eyelids and they fluttered shut without a trace of fear. She went to sleep with the feel of his skin against her face, lulling her into peaceful dreams where there was no darkness.

  Just Eli.

  CHAPTER NINE

  CAROLINE WOKE up to darkness, but she wasn’t afraid. Eli lay beside her, her hand in his. She scrambled to her knees, embracing the darkness with her arms outstretched, and she’d never felt so liberated in her life.

  Eli sat up.

  “You’re awake,” she said.

  “Yeah. I’ve been for some time.”

  “I slept all night and I feel wonderful. Look.” She pointed to the blinds covering the window. “Daylight is tiptoeing in and I haven’t been breathlessly waiting for it. Thank you, Eli. Thank you.” She threw her arms around his neck and hugged him.

  He breathed in the scent of her hair, her skin, and his arms slipped around her waist. She rubbed her cheek against his stubble and he turned his head and captured her mouth. Their lips met in a kaleidoscope of emotions fueled by the need in both of them. Eli opened his mouth, needing more, and Caroline reciprocated with an urgency that surprised her. She wanted to taste and feel eve
ry part of him, and her hands and lips heeded that message.

  Eli lost control the moment she touched him, and he wasn’t fighting too hard to regain it. Her touch and skin were as soft as she was, and he didn’t want to stop the feelings she was bringing to life in him. He lay back, taking her with him, and she rested on top of him, molding her soft curves against his hardness. Nothing else mattered but this moment, holding Caroline, loving Caroline.

  Through that newborn pleasure a thread of reason penetrated.

  This is wrong. This is wrong.

  He tried to push it away, but his ethics were stronger than the man in him, and he slowly pulled his lips away.

  “Eli.” She kissed the side of his face.

  He hesitated for a second before slipping from her arms and getting out of the bed. “I can’t do this.” He tightened the belt on his robe.

  “Why?”

  He ran both hands through his hair. “Because I only wanted to help you fight the fear—that’s all. You’ve been through a traumatic ordeal and a broken engagement. We don’t need to complicate things. Besides, you’re a witness on a case I’m working.”

  “I see.”

  She looked so sad sitting in the middle of the bed with her hair in disarray and her eyes glistening with a pain he’d just put there. But he’d done the right thing. She would realize that later.

  “I’ll get my things and leave.” He paused at the door, finding it hard to walk away. “Are you okay?”

  She swallowed. “Yes. I’m fine.”

  But he could see that she wasn’t. It took every ounce of strength he had to walk out the door. He quickly changed into his clothes and within minutes was in his car, heading toward his place, feeling lower than a snake’s belly.

  But he’d done the right thing, he told himself again. Neither of them was ready for a casual affair. Neither of them was ready for a commitment, either.

  Then why did he feel so down?

  CAROLINE HEARD THE DOOR close and burst into tears. “I am not fine, Elijah Coltrane,” she shouted, then lay back, wiping her eyes.

  What was she doing?

  Throwing herself at a man who didn’t want her. She tried to figure out what she was feeling—why she was so attracted to Eli. And she was. She wouldn’t have stopped if he hadn’t. Four weeks ago she’d been in love with Colin, planning a life with him. Today she wanted a stranger to make love to her. To say she didn’t know what she was doing or thinking was probably an understatement.