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Son of Texas (Count on a Cop) Page 23
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“Oh, yes, Andrew loves you with all his heart.” She touched his arm. “But you’ve always known that. What’s different now?”
“Me. Meeting the dysfunctional Beckett family made me see what exceptionally good parents I had. I let the stigma of my birth tarnish what I had, what I was given. And I know that hurt Andrew.”
“He understood how you felt.”
“How could he? I didn’t. I couldn’t understand what was so wrong with me that my own father didn’t want me.”
“Caleb, look at me.”
Caleb stared into brown eyes so much like his own.
“It had nothing to do with you. It was me. Joe was an insanely jealous man and…”
“I know the story. Joe thought you were cheating on him with Andrew because you were in the choir together. When you became pregnant, Joe said it was Andrew’s and you had several arguments where he would hit you.” He swallowed. “The church helped you get out of that abusive situation and you left him, not knowing Joe had told Jake all his filthy lies. Jake wouldn’t leave his father and I watched you grieve for many years for your eldest son.”
“I’d made up my mind and I had to leave. I’d had one miscarriage from falling after Joe had hit me. I couldn’t risk losing another. I had to protect you, but I lost another son in the process. I underestimated Joe and vindictiveness.”
Caleb couldn’t even imagine the kind of life his mother had had as Joe’s wife. Her life was so different now, filled with love, laughter, compassion and kindness. All thanks to Andrew, his father.
“What I’m trying to tell you is that it doesn’t matter anymore. Joe McCain doesn’t matter. He’s the one who lost so much by not knowing Beau, Eli or me. But I gained a real father and I want Andrew to know that, to know that I’ve put Joe McCain to rest forever.”
“Oh, sweetheart, you’ve…” The sound of a door opening stopped her.
Caleb stood to greet his father.
Andrew hurried in, his eyes searching for Caleb. He grabbed him in a fierce grip. “Caleb, my son, you’re home. We were so worried.”
Caleb looked into this man’s eyes and all he saw was love, love that had been there from as far back as Caleb could remember. A deep sadness pierced him for any pain he might have caused him.
“Hi, Dad.” He smiled.
“Are you okay? We heard about the wreck.” Andrew looked him over, searching for bruises or broken bones. But Caleb’s injury was on the inside, his own personal pain and not something his parents needed to worry about.
“I’m fine, but I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching and I want to apologize for all those times as a kid I couldn’t get past the fact that Joe McCain didn’t want me.”
“Caleb, you were just a boy trying to find your way.”
“Thank you for being so patient with me and thank you for being my father. I won’t ever forget that again. You’re my father in every way that counts.”
“Son.” Andrew hugged him and they stood father and son bound together by something stronger than blood. Love.
Althea wiped away a tear and joined the hug. “Now sit down,” she ordered. “I’ll make French toast and sausage.”
“Great,” Caleb said. “I’m hungry now.”
A look passed between his mother and his dad and he knew they were worried about him. But he’d survive because he had this strong foundation of a family to lean on.
“If you have time, maybe we can get in a round of golf this morning,” Andrew suggested.
“Sounds good.”
“Eighteen holes?”
Caleb nodded. “Eighteen holes.”
Over breakfast he told them what had happened in Beckett.
“Oh, how awful. Poor Belle…I mean Josie. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.”
He knew the feeling.
“So Josie’s happy now?”
“Yes, Mom, she’s happy.”
“I’ll have to call Gertie and tell her. She keeps asking about Belle. I mean Josie.” Andrew corrected himself.
“We’ve met Ashley and she’s quite charming, but so sad.” Althea poured Caleb more coffee. “But she’s the perfect companion for Gertie and they’ve been getting along very well.”
“I thought they would,” Caleb replied.
But she’s not Josie Belle.
That was all Caleb could think.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
JOSIE’S LIFE SETTLED into a routine she remembered very well. There was something cathartic about routine. Something familiar. And she needed that.
She and Eric were building on their relationship, but they were taking it slow. She needed that, too. Boone had made Eric Chief of Police so he was busier than usual. Those times he was busy she spent on the Silver Spur riding with Caddo, visiting with Boone and actually having conversations with Lorna and Mason. Mostly they wanted her to talk to Ashley, which she did, and Ashley agreed to come home for a visit. Josie’s life was falling into place.
Dennis’s and Rhonda’s bodies had been sent to Dallas for burial in a family plot. Josie still reeled from Rhonda’s obsession to have a child. She’d done everything to make that happen—even murder. Murdering her husband and trying to murder a friend. Josie had to put that behind her and concentrate on the future.
The human teeth from the ashes had been identified as Tracy’s, as they’d suspected, and the FBI released the remains to Mae. A memorial service was held to finally put Tracy to rest. She and Eric attended and spent some time with Mae and the girls. Jenny was blossoming in the care of her grandmother and aunts. Mae had been awarded full custody and Josie knew they were going to be fine. Jenny was where she should be—with her family.
And Josie was where she should be. At times she wondered about Caleb and hoped he was doing well.
She and Eric went to Corpus to go through her parents’ things. Right after her parents’ deaths, she couldn’t do that. She needed all their stuff around her. The house sat on fifty acres. Her father had to have horses and Josie had sold them before she’d left for Beckett but now she had to do something about the house and the land. She couldn’t quite bring herself to sell it yet, but she did give away all their clothes to Goodwill, saving a few cherished items, like the sweater her mother had knitted for Brett and Marie’s wedding dress that she had also made.
Josie fingered the white silk and satin and thought she might get married in the dress. Eric wanted to set a date for September; now she wouldn’t have to look for a gown. Sinking into a chair, she held the dress against her, almost able to see the smile on her mother’s face.
Eric walked into the room.
“Shut your eyes,” she shouted.
He immediately closed his eyes. “Why?”
She quickly placed the dress in the dark plastic and stored it in its box. “Because it’s my mother’s wedding dress and you can’t see it.”
“Why?” he asked again.
“Because I’m thinking of getting married in it and you can’t see it before then.”
His eyes popped open. “You’re setting a date?”
She’d been hesitating, but she wanted all of her life back. “Yes.” She smiled. “Let’s look at a calendar. About the middle of September.”
“You got it.” He grabbed her and swung her around, kissing her deeply. “I know this has been hard for you.”
She rested her head on his chest. It had—trying to live the life that was hers while a small part of her still struggled with the past and her feelings. Eric had been so patient and it was time to live her life to the fullest.
Now she had to tell Caleb. She owed him that.
She hadn’t spoken to him since he’d left and they both knew it was best that way. Ashley had said that he’d come to dinner at Ms. Gertie’s and that he looked very good. Caleb always looked good—a true Texan.
That night she wanted to call him, but at the last minute she chickened out. If she heard his voice, it would be too hard on her fragile emotions. Since she had his
home e-mail address, she decided to e-mail him just a short note. She typed:
Dear Caleb,
Hope you’re doing well. Just wanted you to know that Eric and I have set a date for the wedding in mid-September and I wanted to tell you myself. Wishing you all the best. Josie Belle
She wanted to say so much more, but she was sure he didn’t want to hear another thank you. She quickly clicked Send and went in search of Eric.
CALEB WORKED UNTIL he was exhausted, but Josie’s memory was still strong. He hated that he couldn’t shake his broken heart. He knew from the start that he and Josie had no future. He wished his heart had gotten the message.
Grabbing a beer from the refrigerator, he headed for his computer to check his mail. His eyes froze on Josie Belle in the subject line and he immediately opened it. As he read, his already damaged heart crumbled into nothing. He didn’t even think he was breathing.
She’s getting married. His life just sank to some unexplained emotional depth of pure torture. What was wrong with him? He should be happy. He wanted her happy.
Clicking off the computer, he got up and ran his hands over his face, dredging up some honest emotions. He wanted Josie to be happy with Caleb. Oh, yeah. There it was. The knife in the gut—the knife of truth.
He’d been secretly hoping that Eric would turn out to be a scuzzbag. That truth didn’t feel too good nor did he feel too good about himself. He took a long swig from the can, hoping the beer could erase her memory.
On his second can, the doorbell rang. Who the hell? He wasn’t expecting anyone and he sure as hell didn’t want to see anyone. The bell pealed again. Dammit. He stormed to the door and yanked it open.
His brothers stood there. All of them, Eli, Jake, Beau and even Tuck. Did they have a sensory antenna, or what? For weeks now they’d been showing up at the oddest times just when he needed a friend, a boost. But tonight he wanted to be alone.
“Hey, little brother,” Beau said, holding up a six-pack, as did the others. “We brought beer.”
“I don’t…” His words trailed away as they walked into his living room. Beau carried the beer to the refrigerator.
“I’m really not in a mood for anything tonight,” Caleb said.
“Why not?” Beau wanted to know, and Caleb wanted to smack him as he had when they were kids and Beau wouldn’t take no for an answer.
“Beau, that’s none of our business,” Jake said.
“One beer, then we’ll get out of your hair.” Eli took a seat on the sofa and Beau passed around the beer. “Besides Elise, Ben and Katie are at our house and if I return this early, Caroline is going to give me one of those looks. She loves mothering Ben and Katie.”
Jake plopped down by Eli. “You need to start thinking about having your own kids.”
“Mmm.” Eli took a swallow of beer. “Scares the hell out of me.”
Everyone laughed, except Caleb. He wasn’t in a laughing mood, but he knew there were few things in life that frightened Eli. He felt himself loosening up and he sat on the arm of Tuck’s chair.
Beau brought Tuck a Coke. “Tuck’s the designated driver tonight.”
“Think I should have protested that.” Tuck took the can.
“It was your turn,” Eli pointed out.
“Are we getting so drunk we need a designated driver?” Caleb asked.
“Not me,” Jake said. “I’ve got two kids and I gave that up when I became a father.”
Eli slapped him on the back. “You just love reminding us of that.”
“Hell, I’m the only one with kids. When are you guys going to do something about that?”
Beau shrugged. “Tuck and I are bona fide bachelors. Right?” Beau looked at Tuck for confirmation.
“Right.” Tuck frowned at his drink.
“Yeah, right,” Jake scoffed. “That would change in a heartbeat if your next-door neighbor, Macy, made the first move.”
“And Tuck—” Eli got in on the friendly ribbing “—hasn’t met the right woman. When he does, she’s going to turn him inside out.”
“Don’t count on it,” Tuck said.
Everyone knew Tuck had vowed never to marry or have children because he didn’t know who he was. He was left as a baby at the Tucker’s mailbox and they’d adopted him. Even though he had a happy childhood, he still wasn’t passing down his genes.
As Caleb looked around the room, he saw a lot of scarred men, yet incredibly good men who’d managed to overcome their pasts.
“She’s getting married.” He hadn’t even realized he’d spoken aloud until the room became so quiet he could hear himself breathing.
They didn’t have to ask who he was talking about because they all knew. Beau put an arm around his shoulder. “Sorry. I know that must hurt.”
“Yeah,” echoed around the room.
Caleb twisted the beer in his hand. “I told myself I just wanted her to be happy, but I was lying like hell. I was hoping Eric would turn out to be the biggest creep on the planet. But he’s a nice guy and he’ll make her happy. And no matter what I’m feeling now, I know she’s been through hell and she deserves it.” He sucked in a deep breath and tipped up the can. “Think I’ll drink until I can’t think or feel anymore, then I’ll pick myself up and start living again.” He stared down at the empty can. “I need another beer.”
“We got plenty.” Beau headed for the refrigerator.
“Hey, there’s an Astros’ game on tonight.” Jake reached for the remote control.
Caleb made himself comfortable between Jake and Eli. “Thanks, guys.”
“Any time, little brother,” Beau said.
The game came on and Caleb leaned back his head thinking how lucky he was to have such supportive brothers and a friend like Tuck. Maybe by morning the pain wouldn’t be so bad.
CALEB WOKE UP with a headache and, judging by the number of cans in the trash, he knew he’d had just a little too much to drink. He wasn’t a drinker. He enjoyed a beer or two, a glass of wine, but nothing like the amount he’d consumed last night. But then, he supposed he had a good reason.
Josie Belle was getting married.
The thought caused his stomach to clench tight, but he’d had his drinking binge. Now he had to get on with his life.
By the time he had his coffee, showered and shaved, he was feeling better. He went to his computer to answer Josie.
Dear Josie Belle,
Glad to hear your life is back on track. Maybe all the pain you’ve endured will soon be a distant memory. May you and Eric have many years of happiness. Caleb
That was all he could write. He grabbed his hat and headed for work.
And a new future—without Josie Belle.
JOSIE DRESSED FOR DINNER at Silver Spur. Ashley was arriving at any minute and she and Eric were riding out with her to visit. It was the only way Ashley would go and Josie thought it was time Ashley talked to her mother. She also thought it was time the Becketts started being a family or as close as they could get. She and Lorna would never be the best of friends, but at least now they tolerated each other.
She walked into the kitchen in a black slim-fitting dress.
Lencha turned from the sink, Chula chirping at her feet. “You’re looking mighty pretty this evening.”
“Thanks.” Josie straightened her skirt. She was used to her uniform or jeans. “I hope everything goes well tonight.”
Lencha’s brows knotted together. “Why do you care? The old bastardo…”
Josie held up a hand, stopping her. “This feud with Boone has to end.”
“Not until one of us is six feet under.” At Lencha’s tone, Chula scurried to the door.
Josie placed her hands on her hips. “Why do you hate him so much? Your husband, Izzy, worked on the Silver Spur all his life and when he couldn’t work anymore, Boone gave him this piece of land and a house for all his hard work. And the taxes are paid until you die. Tell me why you still hate him so much?”
“My sweet Marie wasn’t good enou
gh for his son.” Lencha’s gray eyes turned a frigid cold. “She was like my own daughter and when she left I vowed Boone would pay for her unhappiness.”
“But, Lencha, in the end she was happy. She had twenty-seven years with the man she loved and Boone could do nothing about it.”
Lencha lips compressed into a thin line.
“Yes, Boone is rude, abrasive, manipulative, controlling, offensive and I could go on. But he is my grandfather. You can’t change that with all your curses and spells and Mama wouldn’t want you to, either. Nor would she want you to live in bitterness.”
“Best part of my day,” Lencha said under her breath.
Josie suppressed a smile. “Mama’s body is resting on Silver Spur, right next to Daddy’s, the way it should be. Boone could have left Mama’s body in Corpus, but even he couldn’t do that. Their bodies are together just like their spirits are in heaven.” She took a breath. “Please stop this vendetta. Mama would want you to.”
Lencha nodded. “I’ll give it some thought.”
She kissed her cheek. “Thank you. That would make me happy.”
“It doesn’t reach your eyes.”
“What?”
“For weeks you’ve been living this life you left behind, but the joy that should be in your eyes isn’t there.”
“Lencha.”
“When the ranger was here there was a natural light in your eyes that came from here.” She placed a hand over her heart. “Just like when Marie looked at Brett.”
Josie turned away. “I’ve got to go.” She couldn’t have this conversation. Lencha didn’t understand. Caleb was her past, her time out of time, and she couldn’t think about him. She just couldn’t.
As she walked away she wondered why.
THE DINNER WENT WELL considering that Ashley insisted Caddo be there. And Caddo only spoke when prompted by Ashley. There was one tense moment when Boone confronted him.
“It’s time to stop sleeping out on the prairie and live in that brick house Mason built for you. Time to live like a human being, a Beckett.”
Caddo slowly laid his napkin in his plate and Mason rose to his feet, ready to defend Caddo as always. But Ashley beat them to it.