Phoenix Read online

  “Hey, y’all going out to party tonight?” Cole Bryant, another bull rider, asked.

  “You bet,” Paxton told him. “We’re taking Eden out for the evening.”

  “If Eden’s going, then I’m coming, too.”

  Phoenix threw an arm across Cole’s shoulder. “You touch my niece and I’ll have to hurt you.”

  Cole held up his hands. “Okay. I got it, but why don’t you let her make up her own mind?”

  “And why don’t I just punch you in the face?”

  “Come on, guys.” Paxton got between them. “It’s Saturday night. Let’s have some fun.”

  Eden, pretty as a picture with dark hair and green eyes, walked up. “Where are we going tonight?” She wiggled her hips. “I’m eager to dance, especially with my uncs.”

  Rosemary strolled by, leading her horse and not casting an eye their way. There was just something about her that drew Phoenix’s attention. A sadness that he could feel, which was crazy. He must have hit his head in the arena.

  “One of these days, I’m going to ride as good as her,” Eden said.

  Before anyone could respond, Phoenix’s phone buzzed. He pulled it out of his pocket and froze as he saw the name. Ms. Henshaw. “Excuse me. I have to take this.” He walked to the fence and leaned against the pipe railing.

  “Ms. Henshaw?”

  “Mr. Rebel, I have news for you.”

  “You have the results from the DNA test?”

  “Yes.”

  He sucked in a deep breath as if he was going to ride the meanest bull in the world. “What are they?”

  “You’re the father. Ninety-nine point nine, and that’s as close as you can get. There’s no doubt.”

  He slid down the fence like a drunk who’d had one too many. Sitting there on the ground, with the smell of the manure and the animals of the rodeo around him, he suddenly knew his life had just changed. Fun-loving Phoenix would be no more. He had to be a responsible, mature adult now. He had to be a father.

  “Mr. Rebel, are you there?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” Off in the distance, he could see the moon casting a beam that seemed to guide him toward the future, whatever that might be. But it would include a little boy named Jake.

  “Did you mean what you said that day I met with you at your home?”

  “What was that?”

  “That you would take responsibility.”

  Phoenix closed his eyes, and in his mind he could hear his father’s voice. Always take responsibility. Like Jude and Falcon, who had also become fathers unexpectedly, he would never do anything to dishonor his father. “Yes, ma’am. I will take responsibility for my son. What do I do now?”

  “Are you sure about this? The CPS worker in Denver told me she has two couples who want the little boy.”

  All the doubts in his mind vanished. “No. Jake belongs to me, and I will take full responsibility for him. What do I have to do?”

  “Tomorrow is Sunday, but I’ll meet you in my office in Austin in the morning. Jake needs to be with his family as soon as possible. I will give you the papers you’ll need and you will fly to Denver. Make plane reservations as soon as you can. There will be a hearing before a judge on Monday morning. Valerie Green’s maternal rights will be terminated and you will be granted full custody. The CPS worker there will meet you and you can visit with Jake. After the hearing, you can bring him home and he will be legally yours.”

  “I can do that. Give me the address of your office. Oh, wait. I don’t have a pen. Just text it to me.”

  “Okay. I will also text a list of things you will need for the little boy, like a bed, diapers, milk and such. Have you ever been around children?”

  “Yes, some of my brothers have children. So I do have some experience.”

  “Very good. I will send you a text in case you want to pick up some things tonight, and I will see you tomorrow.”

  “Thank you, Ms. Henshaw.”

  He sat there in the warmth of the night, staring at his phone. He didn’t have to wait any longer. He was Jake’s father. How could that be? How could he also not know about it? How could he be so irresponsible? A lot of his family members could answer that before he could snap his fingers. Yep, he was about to pay for his upbringing.

  Paxton and Eden came over. “What are you doing sitting there on the ground?” Paxton asked. “Let’s go.”

  “I have to go home.”

  Paxton and Eden stared at each other, and then they sank down beside him. “Should I say congratulations or I’m sorry?” Paxton grimaced.

  “I’m not sure,” he admitted. “But I’m that little boy’s father, and now I have to live up to the title.”

  Eden put her arm around his shoulders. “You’re going to make a great father. You’re a big kid yourself.”

  “I feel as if I’ve aged ten years in five minutes.” He tried to get to his feet and realized his legs were shaky. This was harder than any fall he’d ever taken. He felt bruised, weak and disoriented.

  Once on his feet, he said, “I’m going home tonight. I have to make arrangements for tomorrow. But you guys stay and party.”

  “No way.” Eden hugged him. “We’re all going home. We’re family.”

  Phoenix didn’t have any strength to argue. His mind was solely on his son and the days ahead. How would he handle this new development in his life? He wasn’t known for maturity.

  They loaded up and headed out, Eden leading with her truck and trailer. Paxton drove and Phoenix made plane reservations on his phone. He got a flight to Denver at eleven in the morning. That didn’t give him much time to meet with Ms. Henshaw, but he wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight anyway, so he would be there early.

  Ms. Henshaw’s text came through and he just stared at all the things that he needed to buy. Diapers. He had a weak stomach. How was he going to change diapers? This was a situation where he really had to cowboy up.

  They didn’t talk much on the drive home. Phoenix’s thoughts were all turned inward. He wasn’t a worrier by nature, but worries jabbed at him like the fists of a prizefighter. Would he make a good father? He had to. It wasn’t a question. It was fact now.

  He leaned back his head and tried to sleep. But all he could think about was that little boy who was crying for his great-grandma. A little boy who had been let down by a reckless, immature father. And an equally reckless, immature mother. Phoenix had to make up for all of that.

  It was a three-hour drive, and Phoenix had never been so glad to see the ranch. In the wee hours of the morning, they drove up to the barn. After unloading her horse, Eden went toward her parents’ house, and Paxton and Phoenix walked toward the bunkhouse.

  On the way, Phoenix kept thinking about the list on his phone. He needed to have those things here when he brought Jake home.

  “I’m going into Temple to buy a baby bed.”

  Paxton stopped on the porch of the bunkhouse, his eyebrows knotted together in confusion. “What? Where can you buy a bed at this time of the morning?”

  “Walmart Supercenter. They’re open twenty-four hours.”

  “Don’t you think you need to rest?”

  “I won’t be able to sleep until I can bring Jake home where he belongs.”

  Paxton sighed. “Okay. I’ll go with you.”

  Phoenix shook his head. “I don’t need you to go with me. I can buy a bed all by myself. Just go to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  “Phoenix…”

  He looked at the brother he’d spent most of his life with and saw the concern and worry in his eyes. “I’m struggling. Okay.” He was as honest as he could be because he couldn’t be anything else at this point. “I have to be there for that little boy. Do you understand?”

  Paxton nodded, and Phoenix headed for his truck. Shopping early in the morning meant there was hardly anyone in the store. Clerks were stocking shelves and a few people were strolling around. He found the baby section and stared at all the clothes and paraphernalia. Where wer
e the baby beds? He found them on another aisle. Again he just stared. What kind did he need? Maybe he should’ve brought Paxton. At least the two of them could have figured out something. But this shouldn’t be difficult. A bed was a bed.

  Or so he’d thought. They came with or without a mattress and in numerous colors from white to espresso to black. In different styles. His head began to spin. Clearly he needed help.

  He turned to search for a clerk and ran into someone. “Oh, sorry. I wasn’t looking where I was going.” He caught the woman’s arm and just stared, unable to believe his eyes.

  Rosemary McCray Wilcott stared right back at him with a look of shock that was echoed in his eyes.

  What was she doing in Walmart at this time of the morning?

  Chapter Three

  “Uh…”

  Rosie was stunned, and she could neither speak a coherent word nor move. The last person she’d expected to run into in Walmart was Phoenix Rebel. It took a full thirty seconds for her to regain her cool. In that time she was very aware of the hand holding her elbow. The firm, callused fingers were gentle and comforting, and that threw her more than seeing him. She didn’t want to feel anything for this man. Very slowly she removed her elbow and licked her suddenly dry lips.

  She’d come in the store only for a few minutes because she was out of Dixie’s treats. The dog would whine and whine until she got them. Also, Rosie had received some unsettling news and couldn’t sleep anyway. She rented ten acres with a barn and corral, where she parked her trailer. Mrs. Boyd, the owner, had called and said her daughter was moving back home and was thinking of building a house on the property. That meant Rosie would have to find another place to park her trailer and another home for Lady. Her lease was up at the first of the year so that gave her a few months, but she’d been hoping to buy the place herself one day. Now she had to change her plans.

  Whenever she was in Walmart, she couldn’t resist strolling to the baby section. It was gut-wrenching, but cathartic in a way for her loss of her little girl. One day, maybe, she could stop reliving the painful memories.

  “I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?” Phoenix asked.

  His strong tones brought her back to the present and the embarrassing situation. “No.” She made to walk off because she had nothing else to say to him.

  “Hey.”

  Against her better judgment, she looked back. “Am I taking up too much space?”

  “I deserve that.” The corners of his mouth lifted in a cockamamy grin, which she was sure worked wonders on the opposite sex. To her dismay it was working on her, too.

  She’d never seen a more handsome cowboy than Phoenix, and she hated that she noticed. In tight Wranglers, boots and a plaid shirt, he was every girl’s dream. The strong, carved facial bones that showcased a perpetual smile only added to the masculine mix. As did the Stetson and the riot of dark hair that always peeped out from under it.

  “I’m really sorry for being rude in Oklahoma. I was having a very bad day.”

  The apology put a dent in her already shaky composure. Walk away. Walk away. The words kept running through her mind, but her feet wouldn’t move as she stared into his dark eyes. Dark, warm, smiling eyes.

  “I’m looking for a baby bed, and I could really use some help. Are you up for the job?” He tilted his head slightly, and the teasing light in his eyes did a number on her control.

  Again, against her better judgment, she asked, “Why would you need a baby bed?”

  “Well, you see, I just found out I’m a father.”

  “Oh.” His honesty threw her, and her curiosity spiked. “And you get to be a weekend father?”

  “No. Full-time.”

  “You’re getting custody of a baby?”

  The light in his eyes turned up a notch. “Yeah. Go figure.”

  She gave up trying to make herself leave. He needed help with baby stuff, and there was nothing she would love more. It would hurt. But she just loved the punishment, she supposed.

  “Girl or boy?”

  “Boy.” He gave a thumbs-up sign.

  “You must be excited.” At that, her guard went down so far she could no longer see it.

  Suddenly a look of resignation crossed his face. “I would be lying if I said I was excited out of my mind. It’s been a shock and I’m trying to adjust. He’s twenty-five months old.”

  She could have said a lot of petty things about the cowboys and the buckle bunnies around the rodeo, but she saw the hurt in his eyes. “Is the mother out of the picture?”

  “Yeah. She left the boy with her grandmother and the grandmother has passed away. CPS tracked down the father, which happens to be me.”

  Rosie didn’t know what else to say. It had to have been a big shock, and he seemed to be taking it well. She glanced at the row of baby beds. “If he’s twenty-five months old, you probably need something you can convert into a toddler bed.” She pointed to a box that had a picture on it. “See, there’s one. It goes from baby to toddler.”

  “That looks perfect.”

  She walked over to several boxes. “There are different colors. Maybe dark chocolate or warm honey. Which do you prefer?”

  “Warm honey. Every time.”

  She ignored the hidden reference to her in his voice. But it made her very aware of her attire: sweatpants, flip-flops and an old T-shirt. Her long hair was loose, and she brushed it away from her face in a nervous gesture. “They…they’ll probably have to load this into your truck, so it probably would be best to just take a picture with your phone and show them at checkout.”

  “Now, see, that’s why women are best at this. They cover all the angles.” He took a quick photo and then looked at something on the phone. “I have to get a car seat, and she gave me the brand name.”

  “She?”

  “The CPS worker.”

  “Oh. And you’ll need sheets, too.”

  He looked at his phone again. “She didn’t say anything about sheets.”

  Men! “Are you going to let him sleep on the bare mattress?”

  That smile was back in place and it was lethal. “Okay, sheets it is.”

  “They’re in the next aisle.” He followed her around the corner with his cart. They looked like a normal couple out shopping early in the morning. But they would never be a couple. “Here they are.” She squatted to glance through them. “There are ones with duckies, horses, dogs and…”

  “Horses.”

  “And cartoon characters…”

  “Horses.”

  “Oh, look at these John Deere ones.”

  “Horses.”

  “And there are solid colors…” She held up her hand before he could say the word. “I know—horses.”

  “Well, he’s my kid and I like horses so he’ll like horses.”

  She pulled three sets off the shelf. “You are in for a what-have-I-gotten-myself-into moment.” She stood and handed him the sheets.

  Placing them in the cart, he asked, “Why do I need so many?”

  “Think, cowboy. It’s a baby and babies pee. A lot. So you need extras in case of an accident.”

  He reached down and grabbed two more.

  After that, he followed her around the store and listed off everything on his phone. His cart was stacked high with diapers. There wasn’t room for one more thing. Actually he couldn’t even see over it.

  And then they were in the toy section because he wanted to get a toy for the baby. As she walked by all the baby dolls her throat closed. It had been almost nine years and still the pain was as raw and new as the day they’d told her that her baby was dead. She stopped and stared at a doll with reddish-blond hair and couldn’t look away. She was trying not to remember. Not to feel. Not to act like a complete fool.

  “I don’t think he’ll like that.” Phoenix’s words brought her out of her trance. She didn’t quite make it on the fool part because she felt sure he thought she was crazy.

  “Boys play with dolls.” She tried to cover up the emb
arrassing moment.

  “Not my boy.”

  “Oh, please. Don’t tell me you’re going to be one of those fathers.”

  He walked past her to the boy section, ignoring her words. “Now we’re talking.” He picked up a truck and trailer with horses. “My kid will love this.”

  “You know, you’re under the impression this little boy is going to be just like you. Sometimes it doesn’t turn out that way. I’m not an expert, but I’m right on this.”

  He didn’t fire any heated words back at her. He just stared down at the truck and trailer in his hands. “Yeah. I know nothing about the kid, but I hope I find a part of me in him.”

  “You haven’t met him?” She couldn’t hide the shock in her words.

  “No. I’m flying out to Denver tomorrow to pick him up and to meet him.”

  She had no words and she wanted to ask questions, but she felt it was time to put an end to this unexpected interlude. She didn’t want to get involved in his life, and she didn’t want to know any more about him and his son.

  “I have to go. I wish you the very best with your little boy.”

  He looked into her eyes, and once again she felt the warmth all the way to her heart. “Thanks. May I call you Rosie?”

  She shook her head. “You and I will never be on a first-name basis. Tonight was just a time out of time that neither one of us expected and will never be repeated. You know the reasons why.”

  “Come on. That’s not fair. You’re not even a McCray anymore.”

  “I was born a McCray and I will always be a McCray.”

  “I might need more help…”

  She wasn’t falling for that again. “Goodbye. I’ll see you around the rodeos.” Walking away, she felt something she couldn’t quite describe. Being lonely was just a part of her, but tonight, for a brief moment, she’d felt something special with a man she didn’t even like. She’d felt like a woman again. It was hard to describe since all they’d done was talk. Phoenix Rebel probably didn’t even want the child, but she had to admire that he was making the best of it. She would never be lucky enough to get a chance at having another child. The rest of her days, she would spend alone. But tonight she felt the wonder of it all because she couldn’t resist his dark, warm eyes.